From Buster pal Matt Schliske

Hard to believe, we know, but it’s time once again for The Hideous Jabbering Head of Izaak Walton’s Very Hairy Holiday Revue Special Thing! Ike likes to open with a song.

Oh the gallant Fishers life,
It is the best of any,
’Tis full of pleasure, void of strife,
And ’tis belov’d of many:
Other joyes
are but toyes,
and I hope I get the one with Kunge Fu Grippe!

In the Black Forest they celebrate by getting shitfaced, setting fire to 800-lb straw-packed oak wheels, rolling them down mountainsides into sleepy villages and making bets on the fates of the panicked peasantry as they flee in terror. Here comes a Merry Christmas! Who’s dreaming of sugarplums NOW, proles?! And though I can’t think of anything more perfectly German, I must say that they’ve at least got a handle on merrymaking. I mean, c’mon, who doesn’t want to try this? Like, right now, let’s go. 

A festive holiday story from a while back that I like to share at this merry time of year. I grant you The Power of Lutefisk!

Not a lot of people know this, but the Hideous Jabbering Head of Izaak Walton loves Elvis.

And finally, Brother Glista’s done it again. Behold this year’s holiday fly candy, fever-dream fresh from the festive frankenlab:

Be safe, scamps! Now go make some merry!

Here at BWTF, we tend to do a lot of ripping on all the greedy, evil shit out there that is trashing our planet. And we don’t apologize for any of it, because frankly, they deserve it.  And because if we didn’t give voice to it, we’d likely go off the deep end and become even more misanthropic, mumbling hermits than we already are. Last but not least, we’re also kind of addicted to clean air and water. Call us “old skool” in that way, but we ain’t kickin’ our habit.

At the same time, we also need to give props where props is due on those all too rare occasions, and celebrate the good. So here’s a tasty, steaming plate of it for the holidays:

Secretary of the Interior, Ken Salazar, has announced today that high quality Bureau of Land Management acreage would once again be considered for potential wilderness designation and other protections, a move that could safeguard some of the country’s best remaining fish and game habitat and lands that harbor some of the finest hunting and fishing in the country.

Before you say, “big deal,” keep in mind that this policy change pretty dramatically amends a Dept. of the Interior policy adopted in 2003 by then Secretary of the Interior Gale Norton, who determined that the BLM would no longer consider new lands for “wilderness study area” designation.

“Whether they are called wilderness study areas, roadless area or wilderness, sportsmen know that the best habitat for fish and wildlife and the best hunting and angling opportunity is found in backcountry areas,” said TU President and CEO, Chris Wood.

The new policy would not, in and of itself, create new wilderness areas – that can only be done by an act of Congress. It would, however, give the BLM more leeway in managing some of its best remaining habitat in a way that protects high-quality lands from unnecessary development, illegal motorized incursion, and other uses that diminish the quality of public lands.

“Interior’s announcement will require the BLM to analyze the fish, wildlife and water values of backcountry areas before allowing development activities that would otherwise impair them,” Wood said. “This is simply common sense applied to commonly-owned lands for the common good. Hunters and anglers across the country should thanks Secretary Salazar and BLM Director Bob Abbey for an early Christmas present.”

Good new, indeed. If you have the time, write Ken and Bob a “thank you” card, and get out and explore and enjoy our public lands. That’s why they’re there.

And for more info on TU’s efforts to protect backcountry, go here.

Happy Holidays, Busterites.

Maybe an explanation is on order, but well, fuggit.

Just reminiscing on a great fall.

The Pebble Limited Partnership CEO has called those who oppose development of the Pebble Mine, wait for it, “Legal Terrorists” (Video Link)

It’s official- if you believe in clean water, sustainable living and protecting America’s fisheries, both commercial and recreational, you are a terrorist. Words have lost all meaning now.

A big hat tip to Headwaters for the video link.

It is entirely possible that I could have missed some memo on popular culture while off gallivanting in the woods or something, but…when did it become fashionable for TVLand to glorify resource extraction and the apparent dearth of “real men”? I seem to remember a time when the so-called “science channels” actually offered programming that was intellectually stimulating and informative. Now we are swamped with “work reality” shows that are the programming equivalent of “Jersey Shore” – narcissistic, vapid, and intellectually devoid.

“Ax Men”
“Swamp Loggers”
“Black Gold”
“Ice Road Truckers”
“Deadliest Catch”
“American Loggers”
“Oil, Sweat & Rigs”
“Swords: Life on the Line”
“Gold Rush: Alaska”
“Lobstermen: Jeopardy at Sea”

A fella could probably write this off as backlash against “American Idol” and “Dancing with the Stars”, or as a blanket reaction to the general Pussification of the age 18-34 demographic in America. The real question is, how did the networks end up on the “Drill, Cut & Kill” theme? Are we as a society really that far removed from the actual ACT of resource extraction that  even its mere depiction in some of its crudest forms is enough to capture our attention?

There is a slight possibility that this genre should be viewed as a lame attempt to inculcate a sense of  blue-collar ethic into a workforce that is rapidly separating physical labor from work. While I applaud the attempt, the focus seems a bit misguided – why not show responsible development and extraction? Why glorify some practices that we should have left long ago (see also: Clearcutting, Riparian Mining,  Ocean Surface Longlining)?

Given the ongoing battle to protect the planet from the many by the few, is it fair to judge this programming as cultural propaganda, designed to desensitize us to the roar of the bulldozer or the snarl of the chainsaw?

In full disclosure, I have watched at least one episode of all of these shows. I do this because I hold out hope, hope that there will be a smidgen of precious tv time donated to the acts and arts of conservation, responsible and sustainable extraction practice, and active mitigation when things inevitably go wrong. I watch as a form of anger management, because nobody gets arrested if I rough up my tv. I watch to see the reflection of our society’s values, searching for the ripple of discontent and finding only apathy, and getting a weird sort of gluckschmerz out of all this…

So far, I haven’t been disappointed.

I’ve seen what oilfield transportation corridors do to the economy and community of a region. It is a hurly-burly low-wage twenty-four hours/seven days a week service industry that does not build community. - Rick Bass, Author

The first big beneficiaries of this hijacking will be a Korean steel company hired at the expense of Canadian steel workers, and Exxon—the richest corporation in the world: the losers will be the American people, starting with us. - David James Duncan, Author

America continues its apparent national quest to despoil every square inch of the continent with the plan to truck large tar sand “modules” down HWY 200 in the Blackfoot Valley of Montana. The modules are about 3o feet tall, 24 feet wide and the length of a football field. Apparently the most direct route from their construction in Korea is from port at Lewiston, ID, through Montana and on up to Canada. Due to the width of the modules, both lanes of HWY 200 will be one direction and both sides of the road will be cleared for the additional 8 feet of clearance needed.

Not surprisingly, residents of the valley, which is the location of Norman Maclean’s “A River Runs Through It”, are pissed. They formed the grassroots org All Against the Haul to coordinate opposition to the project, which would severely alter the character of the valley and negatively impact the natural resources there.

As always, when oil and money combine, you get the politicians coming out of the woodwork to defend poor, helpless Exxon Mobile,;  Politicians such as Montana Governor Brian Schweitzer. Here are some choice quotes from the good Governor in a NYT article along with some commentary: 

“Chlorine, insecticides and fertilizers go down these roads in trucks every day,” he said. “If they spill, they would kill fish for 50 to 100 miles.”  

Yes they do, but chlorine, insecticides and fertilizers are also packaged as HAZMAT, and are limited by CFR 49 to certain amounts per transportation method, all with the goal of not spilling. Yes accidents happen, but there is a world of difference between an 18 wheeler and the transporters moving these modules.

But the large loads, he said, “are inert, like big shoe boxes made of steel. If one fell in the river, they could be cut in half or taken out whole.” Until they were removed, he argued, “fish could spawn under them.”

Well fuck, I guess that makes it all better; Although the effort to remove the giant shoebox would probably destroy a fairly large swath of habitat.

Many residents worry that the loads will block emergency vehicles, but the governor said helicopters could provide transport.

And how many air ambulance helicopters does the area around Missoula have? A quick check indicates 2 and the cost for a 56 mile flight ranges from $12K to almost $17K. Medicaid and the insurance companies are going to love this.

But Mr. Schweitzer argues that the roads are a federally financed transportation corridor. “Montana can’t up and change the rules because we don’t like somebody,”

Umm, didn’t Montana tell the BATFE to take a flying leap with the Montana Firearms Freedom Act? Oh yeah, it did:

The bill was introduced January 13, 2009 by Joel Boniek, Gerald Bennett, Edward Butcher, Aubyn Curtiss, Lee Randall and Wendy Warburton. It was signed in to law by Governor Brian Schweitzer on April 15, 2009 and became effective on October 1, 2009.

So, the good Governor is perfectly content to tell the Feds to STFU when it comes to guns, but meekly accepts the rules when it comes to limiting damage to the Blackfoot Valley. Uh-huh

There are a couple of new designs for the holidays at the Buster Store, guaranteed to draw weird looks from the inlaws.

Our “Stupid Espensive Hoodie” line has expanded to include the tat design:

I have no idea who’d want a BWTF travel mug, but the tat design looks badass on stainless steel.

Go order yours at the Skagit Master 2 e-commerce page.

And if you want, go to the Skagit Master Forum and get your Skag on.

“A lawyer for companies seeking to mine in southwest Alaska used a core sample, large maps and photos to show Monday that exploration of the area had been carefully conducted with high regard for the environment.Matthew Singer, attorney for the Pebble Partnership, described the Pebble Mine site as likely the most studied land in Alaska, and said a massive amount of environmental data has been collected there.The area is at the center of a lawsuit brought by eight Bristol Bay village corporations over state-issued exploratory permits for the huge copper, gold and molybdenum deposit near some of the world’s most productive wild salmon streams.” -Business Week 7 Dec 2010

The trial over the questionable permitting process granted to Anglo American began this Monday in Anchorage. As you may or may not know, the trial is the result of a lawsuit by eight Bristol Bay village corporations over the exploratory permits granted to Anglo American. According to the Alaska state constitution, exploratory permit process requires public comment as well as impact studies prior to the granting of an exploratory permit.

Anglo American was granted exploratory permits without following the perscribed process.  

Somehow I don’t think that is a true statement.

A look at some of the titles strewn around the Buster offices.  Maybe you’ll get some gift ideas, I dunno.

Note: We’re not including The Alaska Chronicles here until Gaper does something with the throne he’s built with his extra hardbacks. It was funny at first, but now he’s adding strange found objects and animal parts to it and it’s starting to smell weird.