After G_Smolt’s thoroughly tasteless post advocating bead bouncing with a bamboo stick, we felt it was time to get back on track, appeal to our literate readers and pull this place out of the gutter.

But then, well, we got distracted.

Capr fishing explained:

“I believe it is the purest form of fly-fishing.”

- Daniel Galhardo, Tenkara USA

You know, Danny, I really don’t care how other people fish. Honestly, as long as you’re not raping the resource, do whatever you want. But can you spare us the sanctimonious bullshit about how, just because you don’t have a reel, you’re somehow doing something that’s more “pure” than the rest of us?

But let’s take your logic forward - if ditching my reel makes me “more pure,” then ditching all of my tackle would mean a full state of never-ending satori,  right?

I give you His Venerable Noodleness, the Dalai Jerry Wayne:

(Photo by Pete McDonald)

BP Spills Coffee - watch more funny videos

By now, most of you have heard about the proposed Pebble Mine in Bristol Bay. I won’t insult your intelligence by rehashing the gory details (as provided by The Pebble Partnership) of the preliminary project report, but I would like to take this opportunity to make a few points.

- In addition to the proposed Pebble project, there are roughly 3.6 million acres of BLM land slated to become the Bristol Bay Hard-Rock Mining District. 1 million of these acres were opened to claims in 2008, the rest is closed but “pending designation”.

- According to the EPA, the hard-rock mining industry is the single largest source of toxic releases in the US.

- As of 2008, 93% of large-footprint mines similar to the proposed Pebble Project had violated their environmental standards.

- Bristol bay produces 70% of Alaska’s sockeye, worth $130 million in ex-vessel prices alone last year.

- Entering its 126th year, the commercial fishing industry and its support infrastructure in Bristol Bay represents roughly 75% of local employment.

- Alaska is still the only MSC-certified sustainable sockeye salmon fishery in the world.

- No fewer than 30 major gold handlers have spoken out against the proposed Pebble Mine, vowing to never buy gold sourced from Bristol Bay.

This isn’t just Alaska’s problem. With the BLM maneuvering to open the Bristol Bay Hard-Rock Mining District, it is now OUR problem. Instead of just wringing our hands, shouting at the television, or giving up in resignation, may I suggest a few alternative strategies?

For starters, go to the Save Bristol Bay website and sign the petition for the continued closure of BLM lands to mining interests. Shoren and company were thoughtful enough to have 2 separate petitions, one for Alaskans and one for the rest of y’all.

You can also write your state representatives to express your displeasure with the situation, and let them know that the proposed Pebble project and the opening of BLM lands to Hard-Rock Mining represent dangerous precedents in a world of rapidly diminishing wilderness acreage and critical wildlife habitat.

Support a conservation organization directly involved in the fight. The Renewable Resources Coalition, Save Bristol Bay, and the Sportsman’s Alliance for Alaska come to mind. If your the type of fella that might want a little somethin’-somethin’ to show for your monetary contributions, there are some options here…

You can get a bitchin’ T-shirt or Hoodie with the “Over Our Dead Salmon” Troll brothers print from Sportsman’s Alliance. Hoodies are $35, T-shirts are $25…be sure to indicate your size and preference in the comments box.

If you enjoy the occasional beverage, protect your fine furniture from excessive beverage-container humidity with one of these No Pebble logo coasters, thoughtfully milled by the folks at Abel Automatics…yours for the low price of a $15 donation…type “Abel coaster” in the comments box.

If you would like to announce your Uppity Mountain Hippie-ness to the rest of the corporate world, you can snag one of these cool Fish Print Ties from March Brown (scroll down, and include BRISTOLBAY on the checkout screen).  $50, with $25 going directly to the fight against the proposed Pebble Mine…Take your pick from Rainbow Trout, Grayling, King Salmon, Sockeye Salmon, and Pink Salmon. Personally, we like the Sockeye pattern.

In light of recent developments in the world of resource extraction, it’s time to stand up for the last great runs of Sockeye salmon left on earth, and one of the last undeveloped critical riparian habitats in North America.

They aren’t gonna do it for themselves.

From AP:

British Petroleum’s 52-page exploration plan for the Deepwater Horizon well, filed with the federal Minerals Management Service, says repeatedly that it was, “unlikely that an accidental surface or subsurface oil spill would occur from the proposed activities.”

And while the company conceded that a spill would impact beaches, wildlife refuges and wilderness areas, it argued that “due to the distance to shore (48 miles) and the response capabilities that would be implemented, no significant adverse impacts are expected.”

- Approximately 75% of migrating waterfowl traversing the U.S. pass through the Gulf.

- The state bird of Louisiana, the Brown Pelican, was just taken off the Endangered Species List last year. They are in the midst of their breeding season right now on Gulf islands.

-  One of the world’s largest colonies of the threatened Least tern.

- Up to 20 National Wildlife Refuges could be potentially affected by the spill, many home to species that are already threatened or endangered.

- Already hit - Breton National Wildlife Refuge, home to the largest tern colony in North America, predominantly of sandwich, royal, and caspian terns. Also American oystercatcher, Brown pelican, Reddish egret and endangered Piping plover. Also an important wintering area for Magnificent frigatebird, and stopover site for Redhead and Lesser scaup.

- The Gulf of Mexico yields more finfish, shrimp, and shellfish annually than the south and mid-Atlantic, Chesapeake, and New England areas combined.

- 59% of the nation’s total oyster catch.

- 73% of the nation’s shrimp harvest.

- $660 million dollar annual commercial fishery

- In Louisiana alone, recreational and commercial fishing have a total economic impact of about $4 billion, according the the state’s Department of Wildlife and Fisheries.

 * All stats courtesy of the EPA, National Marine Fisheries Service, The American Bird Conservancy, The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, Louisiana Dept. of Wildlife and Fisheries

This sort of douchebaggery should be painful.

You watch, some Saturday afternoon humanity will be wiped out by ridiculous alien invaders, and it WON’T be because they want our planet or our women or our precious bodily fluids, oh no. It’ll be because we’re bigger jackasses than them. Nice going, Skeeter.

From Monday’s Anchorage Daily News comes this fine tidbit:

SOUTHWEST ALASKA — The nation’s second-largest jewelry retailer on Tuesday
joined the opposition to development of a gold and copper prospect in Southwest
Alaska.

Zale Corp. said it will boycott precious metals from the Pebble prospect if it
becomes a mine. Zale also said it supports permanently protecting the Bristol Bay
watershed from large-scale metals mining. Pebble is situated near the headwaters
of two of Bristol Bay’s salmon-spawning rivers. Five Bristol Bay rivers collectively
support the world’s largest wild-sockeye salmon fishery.

The Texas-based jewelry giant has 1,930 stores in the United States, Canada and
Puerto Rico.

Conservation group Earthworks and partners have now enlisted more than 30
jewelers to oppose Pebble development.

Canada’s Northern Dynasty Minerals Ltd. and London-based Anglo American
have formed the Pebble Partnership to work the Pebble prospect. John Shively,
chief executive of the partnership, said Zale coming out against Pebble is
nothing more than a meaningless publicity stunt.

“It is pretty easy for a company to come out against buying gold that doesn’t
exist at this point,” he said. “We are years away from construction. The
people managing that company now will probably be gone. Big deal.”

Field & Stream has picked up the “big deal” comment and run, but
(surprise, surprise) the Hook n’ Bullet crowd that comments over there has
somehow figured out how to turn it into a political condemnation - as if this issue
didn’t exist prior to 2008. Amazingly enough, the comments at ADN are
startlingly lucid.

Apparently, Shively couldn’t handle the pressure of not being an asshole in the
same league as Gail Phillips and Bruce Jenkins.

Be careful what you wish for, John…

Dear Asshat Who Low-Holed That Sweet Tailout From Under Me Yesterday: Yes, you’re a pinner, and there’s no doubting the effectiveness of your floaty toy and sac antics. But you’re also a thoughtless inconsiderate slob of a toolshed no matter what gear you’re using. As for not being thrown in the drink, you’re welcome, but I hope that when your wife picked you up later she promptly punched you square in your stupid face. She looked like the type. Anyway, now your backside gets to enjoy a moment of interwebs fame with a juvenile bit of Photoshop fun. Here’s the original, have at it, savages (you can post yours in the comments using html, but keep them under 800 pixels wide, or you can send them down the email hole).

 ”It’s premature for any reasonable person to formulate an opinion on whether this project’s benefits outweigh the risks.”

- Bruce Jenkins, COO of Northern Dynasty Minerals (quoted from the film, “Red Gold“)

Fast forward. Reported last week in the Anchorage Daily News:

“The companies seeking to develop the massive Pebble mine prospect in Southwest Alaska have agreed to pay a $45,000 fine to the state for unauthorized use of water at their drilling sites.

State regulators said Friday they have suspended the permits for exploration at the Pebble copper and gold deposit…”

More here.

So, Mr. Jenkins, if I have this straight, your company can’t even be trusted to do something as basic as draw water from the correctly permitted sources for some comparatively small-scale drilling, but you want us to trust you with building and operating the largest open pit mine in North America on the headwaters of critical wild salmon habitat?

Not a fucking chance.

Money quote by pro-dam state representative: “We don’t need any more water in the ocean - it’s full.”

Friend of Buster Dillis McQuiver showed off his filthy dirtball nature by sticking this rainbow in not one, but two different holes at the same time. That’s right look closely, she’s got a worm in her ass and a hare’s ear in her maw. No one has ever called Dillis (or anyone else associated with Buster) a purist but double penetrating a trout may bring us to a whole new level. For the record, I was there and he did not insert either hook after landing the fish, she came to hand double stuffed.

She’s a dirty little slut

From the recent invite sent out by the American Museum of Fly Fishing:

Angler’s All Presentation
November 12

Grand Hyatt

Washington, DC

Please join the AMFF on Thursday, November 12, 2009, for our Anglers
All Presentation in Washington, DC. The evening will also include an
address by former Vice President Dick Cheney. Festivities begin at the
Hilton in Washington, DC, at 6 p.m., and will include appetizers,
wine, and dinner.

A seat in the back row will run you $500. Seating within firing range will cost up to $10,000 and require an apology after the fact. That’s not a joke. Well, maybe the apology part.

To make your reservation now, or to let the AMFF know how excited you are (not) about their choice of speaker, go to the American Museum of Fly Fishing website (sorry, we won’t link them).

Douchebags…

I really thought the recession would kill this off, except now the WSJ thinks it’s prime time to expand the idea. 

“While glamping is sometimes caricatured as over-the-top luxury (think butlers with bug spray), its real potential is in making “roughing it” a little less rough but still affordable. At the moment, the very high-end dude ranches are still conspicuous consumption. But camping with trimmings — tents with heaters, eco-outhouses, showers hidden around the corner — has tremendous appeal.  It’s outdoorsy, but with a good mix of the comforts of an active resort.  The business people who provide these experiences get to skip building a big hotel, and put up “mobile rooms” instead. Meanwhile, glampers get a feeling of being close to nature, with a full complement of activities like hiking, fly-fishing and kayaking.”

New vid about what’s at stake with oil and gas leases on Colorado’s Roan Plateau:

More info here.

And to contact the Department of the Interior with opinions on this issue:

Phone: 202-208-3100
E-Mail: feedback@ios.doi.gov

Prolly won’t be on the youtubes much longer.

If you happen to be one of those people who still have confidence that Northern Dynasty, the company behind the proposed Pebble Mine, will somehow run an entirely clean operation with no impact on the surrounding environment, or that ND’s COO, Bruce Jenkins, is truly being honest when he says things like, “it’s premature for any reasonable person to formulate an opinion about whether or not this project’s benefits outweigh the risks,” just consider that one method Northern Dynasty has proposed for disposal of its toxic tailings is to pump the waste into Lake Iliamna, and/or other surrounding lakes. For those unfamiliar with the area, Lake Iliamna is the largest freshwater lake in all of Alaska, home to the headwaters of critical salmon spawning rivers, and to the people who live along its shores and depend on its salmon runs.

On Monday, July 5th, in a vote of 6-3, the Supreme Court made it far easier for Northern Dynasty to pursue that possibility if it chooses to do so, by upholding a definition put forth by the Bush Administration to label mine tailings as “fill” rather than pollution, therefore skirting around prohibitions stated in the Clean Water Act. While the ruling in question concerned the Kensington gold mine in southeast Alaska (owned by Coeur), which had petitioned to be able to dispose of its tailings into nearby Slate Lake, it is also one method that is being considered by the Pebble Mine as well. Yesterday’s ruling makes it a much more likely possibility given that other disposal methods tend to be a lot more costly.

Damn the justices of the Supreme Court who voted in favor this ruling (Roberts, Alito, Thomas, Scalia, Breyer and Kennedy); a ruling which undermines the very type of thing that the Clean Water Act was intended to outlaw. Far beyond merely the Bristol Bay issue, however (as if that isn’t bad enough), this ruling opens the doors to a potentially devastating amount of impact to our watersheds wherever mining activity occurs.

Read Alaskan commercial fisherman Izetta Chambers’ passionate op-ed piece on the Supreme Court ruling in the recent Anchorage Daily news.

For more on this decision, and other recent, quietly-made Supreme Court decisions which help protect corporate polluters, in the recent L.A. Times: Justices Ok Dumping Mine Waste in Lakes.

And if you’ve somehow been living under a rock and haven’t heard about the Pebble Mine, or the award-winning film by Feltsoul titled, “Red Gold,” check the trailer and learn more here.

June 5th, 1976. Teton county, eastern Idaho. The dam on the Teton River failed, sending a wall of water 15 feet high and 7-8 miles wide, downstream.

11 people were killed.

Thousands of homes and businesses were destroyed.

Estimates of the damage were well over $1 billion (in 1976 $).

During construction, Trout Unlimited teamed up with other concerned groups and filed an injunction to get construction on the dam suspended, citing inadequate environmental analysis. The judge threw the injunction out, and construction continued.

One of the points raised by the coalition was insufficient examination of the porous rock on site. The porous nature of the rock that the dam was built on was noted as a key reason for the dam’s failure.

The dam failed before it had entirely filled. It continues to be the worst failure in the history of the Bureau of Reclamation.

Fast forward to today. The State of Idaho has recently granted $800,000 to research new water containment options in the upper Snake region, including considering rebuilding the Teton Dam.

The Teton River is home to a struggling population of native Yellowstone cutthroat. There are other, safer and less impactful options to address eastern Idaho’s water needs.