Sealed drag reel? - Check.
Plastic line? - MmHmm.
Fluorocarbon? - Yup.
Gussied up 8mm bead? - You betcha.
Bamboo rod? - Why the hell not?
Props to the Fine Bastard what made her, goofy lumps and all.
Have at it scamps
BP Spills Coffee - watch more funny videos
Not that we condone or endorse such behavior
There seems to have been a fair bit of righteous indignation evidenced on less-worthy blogs out there recently over the introduction of Idylwilde’s new bobber, the “Sindicator.” Let’s start by getting one thing straight - we’re hard pressed to think of a more ridiculous thing to get your panties in a twist about than the “intellectual property rights” of a friggin’ bobber. I mean, what more evidence do you need that you are a pathetic dork who needs to get a life? Put down your role-playing dice and go wet a line for chrissakes.
And, normally, we’d be perfectly happy to stay out of something as utterly ruh-tarded as this and let it pass. But there’s one thing about it all that finally prompted us to put on our due diligence hats - you see, in all this teeth-gnashing and general uppity-ness and rush to snap judgment, no one seems to have thought about actually talking to Idylwilde and getting their side of the story. Radical idea, eh? Naw, far better to simply milk the melodrama and watch your coveted hit count go through the roof, right?
Enough. As loyal Buster readers have come to expect from the best info-tainment source on the planet, we decided to once again differentiate ourselves from the competition by getting off our lazy, blogging asses and going straight to the source to talk to Zach Mertens, Proprietor and Chief Instigator of Idylwilde:
1) Seems like you’ve been taking a few hits lately over how awesome Sindicators make the user in this whole drama surrounding BobberGate 2010. First off, how did you find yourself in the trapped air business anyway?
Yeah, I have been a target recently. There are some people that seem pretty fired up about their bobber brands these days. Unfortunately no one has “reported” on why Sindicators have arrived in the market place. You are the 1st publication of any kind that had contacted me and asked why Idylwilde made this decision.
It all started when I contacted the Brian at Westwater products about 2 years ago now, to see if Idylwilde could become a distributer of his Thingamabobbers. At the time Idylwilde offered a couple different kinds of poly indicators and it seemed like Thingamabobbers would be a nice compliment to the existing line.Brian was very enthusiastic about being associated with the Idylwilde brand and being able to leverage my rep. network to increase his distribution with the pro-shops. I made it clear that I was not willing to invest in the distribution of his product if he intended to also make my 3 main competitors distributors as well. Brian agreed and we struck a handshake deal that Idywlilde would have the Thingamabobber distribution based on Westwater not selling to the agreed upon 3 competitors of mine. For all practical purposes an exclusive distribution for Fly Companies.
The business relationship seemed to be going along fine. Dealers liked it because they could call up to order flies and get their bobbers refilled without having to make a call to yet another vendor. Our reps were getting more placement and things seemed like they were on the upswing with our partnership. This past summer, just as I was about to go to print with my catalog, I was told that Westwater products had struck a deal with one of my competitors. The deal was that the competitor would help finance a new mold for a smaller Thingamabobber that would more easily be tied onto a fly directly. (At this time Dreamcast flies was taking existing sizes and tying them on hopper patterns and such).
As you can imagine I was extremely surprised to hear about this new deal being made behind my back. My first reaction was to call Brian and he in fact confirmed that he had made this deal with a competitor of mine. His argument to me was that he was not extending Thingamabobber distribution to this other company but rather striking a deal for a “fly tying component”. So Thingamabobbers that are on flies were apparently not part of the deal. Seems like he forgot that his current partner was a fly company. I could no longer trust the relationship and the fact that Brian wanted to “honor” his deal already made with my competitor led me to the decision to discontinue moving forward as partner in business with Westwater.
Brian to the end felt there was no conflict of interest or violation of our agreement. He wanted Idylwilde to continue to carry the Thingamabobbber and asked what it would take for me to keep going. I responded that I would might consider keeping his product in my catalog if he would be willing to make all Thingamabobbers available to us (meaning the new smaller size). He needed time to pray on that decision. After a few days of (I assume praying) he called me back and said that he would not be willing to go back on his word / agreement with my competitor and that was it.
In the end it was Westwater that went behind Idylwilde’s back and created his own problem. Had he not done that Idylwilde would happily be going along honoring the original agreement and we wouldn’t be having this conversation. In the process of distributing Westwater products I had killed the sales of my existing indicators. My dealers also found other sources for the product could not be depended on to have them in stock. At that point Idylwilde threw all of our R & D sources at bringing to market our own trapped air technology.
2) I’m guessing that, being the professional company which Idywilde is, there was plenty of research that went into whether your ground-breaking trapped air technology would violate any existing patents and/or the Geneva Convention and/or any other longstanding international treaties. For our well-traveled audience, are there any particular countries that they should be aware of, within which this new level of awesomeness may violate customs regulations or be considered an illegal weapon?
Countries where being awesome is frowned upon will most likely bar the import of Sindicators; this would apply to most communist or totalitarian states. Kim Jung Il would not want visitors to his country to be awesome.
So your readers might want to keep that in mind as they prepare for their next fishing trip.As most people are aware, packaging on Westwaters product said “patent pending” on them. Our legal consul looked up the patent and found that the US government had soundly rejected Westwater’s claim of a patent based on the fact that they had not invented anything. The fly fishing public was already attaching indicators through a hole and then inserting the indicators through the bight created by doubling over the line. Bobbers were invented long ago so no luck there. In fact if you look at any large boat that anchors up they use a trapped air device with a loop just like the Sindicators.
3) At the end of the day, do you think that bobbers are really at the root of the drama here, or is this really about certain petty personalities being intimidated by the whole new level of awesomeness that the Sindicator represents?
The latter. I mean who wouldn’t be intimidated by a competing product that made the customer more awesome?
There are a couple things at play here that I believe have caused this ruckus. People that broke the story wanted to create a conflict for entertainment purposes. There was no attempt on anyone’s part to collect any facts before they declared Idylwilde guilty. Friends loyal to Westwater feel that Idylwilde is some huge corporation and have framed this as a, “David v. Goliath” type thing. Unfortunately Idylwilde is not some huge corporation or else I would be off fishing somewhere and logging in to check my bank balance every day and would have one of my minions conducting this interview.
So in the end I think it is fear of competition that has created such anger. I don’t see what the big deal is. If a dealer or consumer wants to support Westwater products then they should. No one is putting a gun to anyone’s head saying, “Sindicators are here now, if you don’t make your customers awesome we will shoot you.” It’s a free market economy buy and support what you want.
4) Any last words for the drama queens out there?
I have a list of unique Idylwilde flies that we brought to the market place that are now being tied by competing companies. Where are the drama queens when Idylwilde product is copied? I don’t spend a lot of time losing sleep over it because dealers support us based on the quality of the flies we deliver and the dependable fill of their pre-season orders.
Figured the guys at Westwater might be a little bummed to have some competition after so many years of having it to themselves. The rest of it I think is a big joke, as no matter how you frame the side you are on, it still just comes down to “fighting about a bobber.”
Me, I don’t have any energy around fighting about bobbers with fly fisherman. My energy and time is better spent figuring out other ways to make my dealers, and the consumers who use my products more awesome!
And there you have it, sports fans. Now how about you go put all that pent up energy into saving native steelhead and trout and healthy watersheds instead? K? Thx.
Just cuz you’re in a drifter doesn’t mean you can’t do a little motorboatin.’ Jamie Briscoe unveils a new creation on the Madison.
The final couple of work days before a fishing trip are probably best used as an exercise in patience, something fisherfolk are supposed to have in voluminous reserve, but for me they’re mostly spent almost telling coworkers to go piss up a rope. My brain checked out a few days ago, so making time pass by being productive, while laudable and maybe even expected, is a joke. So instead I’m left searching for alternatives, like:
Any and all further suggestions are welcome in the comments. Well, they technically won’t be welcome until next week, but you get the idea.
Since it’s some sort of unofficial last hurrah for summer’s mad knees-bent running about behavior, and also because part of the joy of this weird pursuit is in the characters you meet.
“We had just been invited to join an all day golf scramble and drinking bash hosted by a whole medly of fraternal lodge organizations. Elks, Moose, and Eagles strolled about the first tee. Most of the people were meeting for the first time; our identities seemed secure, but since you can’t be too careful we traded our fishing hats for the fezzes of three staggering-drunk Shriners from Anaconda, then filled out our name cards as Methyl, Ethyl, and Nitrate Blitz.
Not all of the Blitz Brothers were strangers to a golf course. One of them had even played in college. Ethyl had the distance, Methyl the hot irons, and Nitrate, to his bemused delight, found that he could putt. Just like lining up the eight ball for a bank shot, he said. The Brothers for as long as they could maintain their momentum atop the bell curve of enhanced perception were like besotted Jedi knights: the force was with them. The tournament was a scramble, a format ideally suited to their condition.
On the holes that ran with the wind the Brothers were absolutely splendid. They birdied the first and third, then Nitrate drained a thirty-foot putt for eagle from the fringe on the par five sixth. First prize was two hundred dollars, and the Blitz Brothers had already decided to spend it all in one place - like maybe Idaho. Then, on the eighth, Methyl was driving the cart in the rough searching for a hooked ball and lighting a cigar when he should have been watching where he was going. All three brothers hiked the tall weeds to the car, then stopped at a drug store, bought a postcard, drew a map to the cart and signed it with a sketch of a scuba diver, then continued fishing toward the Big Hole River, where it was deemed by popular acclaim to be cocktail hour, and time to switch to gin.”
-from True Love and the Woolly Bugger by Dave Ames, 1996
Buster likes this story from Rogue Angel Loretta Rose Wylie.
“This is what the fuck happens when yew outfish yer dad on FATHERS DAY! And you win three dollars from yer daddy for playin’ buck buck buck.”
So it seems that the American Museum of Fly Fishing has found itself in a public relations pickle. Invited Cheney to speak and everything went KABLOOM, and then the Dick didn’t even have the courtesy to turn them down. Hoisted with their own Boga. Bad days. Crazy days.
But jeez, it’s a gnurly little museum and we’d hate to see it consigned to the ever-filling dustbin of Things That Should Be Cool But…you know? So to offer a helpful hand the mad brains at Buster Labs (boiler room, left past the incinerator, put lotion in basket, ask for Epol) have schemed up a way for the AMFF to gracefully put down the Dick and back away with their reputations intact…by making them a donation they can’t refuse. And this way, they get a dinner speaker AND an exhibit in one neat package. Brilliant, no? AMFF, we give you
Hello! The great charm of fly-fishing is that we are always learning! Hello! Thank you! The angling fever is a very real disease and can only be cured by the application of cold water and shooting your lawyer friend in the face! Hello! It is the constant - or inconstant - change, the infinite variety in fly-fishing that binds us fast, but it is not a sufficient basis for a sound, comprehensive energy policy! I think they’re in the last throes, if you will, of a sport that is never the same on any two days of the year. Thank You! Hello!
It, uh, just sorta goes on like that. Epol can certainly probably get that fixed up by the fall, at least long enough to deliver a speech. Then the AMFF can just put it under glass and presto, instant tourist attraction! Just imagine all the big fat Orvis customers students of our noble pursuit arriving to have a word with the reanimated jabbering head of the father of American dry fly fishing! They’ll have to hold another fundraiser just to afford all the new parking they’ll need!
Here’s the good and bad thing, though…to be perfectly honest, it’s a little bit unstable, and the quicker they get it under glass the better (and keep the fluids topped off). Which is why they really have no choice but to cancel the Dick. Really, what’ll it be, a once-in-a-lifetime procurement and a historic speech by a luminary of the sport and a marvel of mad science, or Dick Friggin Cheney?
That’s right.
Anyway, are we awesome or what? Buster is confident that we will, in fact, be greeted as liberators by the AMFF. And they are welcome.
Winter 09 Triploid
Trout Bum Uniform Requirement #1: Beard Like a Rhododendron
Because it’s NONE degrees out there and I can see anchor ice from the road, so I need to laugh.
Oh no, not for me, three men on a horse.
She trains polecats.
Who’s more likely to suffer an undignified and thoroughly goofy death at the bottom of a river with a chicken bone in his larynx - Buster’s pal Nofoolin, or Hammer’s dog Henry?
Consider: Henry is less than one year old.
For Doszapatos
While we can’t reveal our source on this exclusive scoop, we also felt it would be unfair to wait until the date of the story to reveal it to our loyal Busterites. And so, here are the unfortunate results of next week’s election:
FRI, NOV. 7, 2008
Obama’s Loss Traced to Donny Beaver
Single Nonvoter Tipped Election To McCain-Palin Ticket
We’re nothing if not fair, so here goes the addendum piece to “Things Clients Say:”
“It’s really a mid-day fishery.” (and that’s why I’m late…)
“Yeah, my wife gets up before dawn and makes this fried chicken fresh every morning. And that’s her famous potato salad, too.”
“Cutthroats sometimes get a little picky on cloudy days. “ (Trust me, it has nothing to do with the fact that your fly is dragging at mach speed through the water…”
“If your girlfriend goes up front, it will balance the boat better.”
“Yup - upstream is the direction we came from.”
“Mend, mend, mend, mend, mend again…ok, see how you’re fly is dragging now? Go ahead and mend…”
“Well, at least we got to see lots of fish coming up today. That’s cool.” (read: you missed a ridiculous amount of fish today)
“Thanks, that was awesome.”
“Does this river circle back to the car?
“Wait - upstream is that way, right?”
“Wow - it must be awesome to just be able to come out here and fish everyday.” (Uh, yeah, I’m sure it would be, but I’ve been rowing the boat and untangling your lines all day, not fishing, if you hadn’t noticed…)
“Aren’t we going to have to start rowing back upstream soon?”
“Do you think that if we come out here again and do this, and I do my homework beforehand, that I can find an outfitter that does cheaper trips?” (asked by a surgeon, who makes a buttload of $$$, after I spent the day rowing his ass. Well, Bob, if by “cheaper,” you mean someone who’s guiding illegally, yeah, possibly. But don’t expect them to be advertising on the web. Oh, and by the way - you’re an asshole for even asking, thank you very much.)
Are we going to cross the Continental Divide on this trip? (Yup. This is the only river in the country that crosses the continental divide. In fact we’ll be crossing it three times on today’s float. I’ll tell you when so you can get a picture).
“How much should I tip you?” (This is uncomfortable. Why don’t you just give me your debit card and pin#?)
“Thanks, that was awesome.”
And so the story goes: When the Rathbun over at Moldy Chum got his greasy hands on the photos of our gagger king from BC West, this was his reply:
“Badass to say the least. If this doesn’t take the July prize, I’ll administer a jab to my own junk.”
thing is, a high 30’s fish doesn’t get near as close to giant as this, a 62 lb. Queen Charlotte Costco-sized pork rind some dude named Ken with awesome David Hasselhoff T-Top hair rocked a week later.
this king is so big the guy is clearly puking in his mouth during the photo:
That being said, Mr. Chum and your mold:
I‘m pretty sure you owe me and the Buster loyal some payback so let’s see that fist to your figs, eh?
you know, for posterity’s sake.
